Why Some Succeed While Others Struggle

In many conversations, people wonder why some individuals seem to succeed more than others. How is it that some achieve success, run thriving businesses, while others barely make ends meet and continuously complain about their misfortune? Why do some children face challenges in school only to encounter difficulties in their adult relationships?

People who do not fare as well as others typically search for excuses and explanations for their failures. Often, they point fingers at something or someone else, believing that someone or something else is to blame. Such explanations, in many cases, lead to frustration because we convince ourselves that if it’s not our fault, then there’s nothing we can do about it. This frustration often leads to the development of a negative personality, which can, in turn, push people away from our lives. Blaming others for our failures is fundamentally misguided.

We must realize that if we want something to change, we must change ourselves. We need to accept that any change we need must start with us and that whether or not that change happens depends entirely on us. We must understand that no one else will do it for us, and nobody will help us. In reality, nobody else truly cares about it. If we want to achieve success in life, at any level, we must start working on it ourselves and even become different people.

We must acknowledge that we are entirely responsible for our lives and everything that has happened in it until now is a result of our actions and thoughts. If we are not satisfied with our income, job, education, or prospects for the future, it is entirely up to us to start working on ourselves and make the necessary changes. One thing is certain; these changes will not happen on their own.

So, what should we do and where should we start? The foundation of any change is setting a goal. A goal we want to achieve, something we want to change, and why. What result do we want to achieve?

A significant number of people believe that setting goals is a pointless exercise. They may consider it a pleasant pastime, but they believe that nothing will change. Such individuals often come up with a plethora of excuses. Why? Because they have low self-esteem and limited self-confidence. They allow fear to take control and prevent them from pursuing their desires and living the life they’ve always dreamed of.

Of course, working on self-confidence is a rather complex process best done under the guidance of a specialist. However, you can also try it on your own using the “small steps” method. By following the advice below, you will not only achieve what you desire but also significantly boost your self-confidence.

The simplest way is to get a piece of paper and a pen. Then, write down a series of goals you want to achieve and note when they should be achieved (i.e., by when you would like to achieve this goal). Of course, you must be realistic here because if you set a goal like losing 10 kg, know that it won’t happen in a week. You need to set a reasonable deadline for achieving the goal. Then, consider what you lack to achieve your intended goal and, most importantly, what, how, and when you will do to reach it. For example, find the missing competencies, funds, etc. Just like before, write down how, where, and when you will acquire the competencies and funds. Once you have everything nicely described, start taking action step by step to complete each of the written tasks. If the time frame is well-defined, you should not have too much trouble. Do not worry if something gets delayed due to unforeseen circumstances such as a lengthy illness or other urgent matters. In such cases, simply adjust the final time (date) for completing your intended goal. That’s the whole secret to achieving success and raising your quality of life. As I mentioned earlier, by following this path, you will not only achieve your intended goal but also boost your self-confidence, allowing you to take on more significant commitments and enjoy life more than ever before. After creating this plan for the first time, it will become increasingly more straightforward, and you will become more confident. You will be stronger and more willing to take on more significant challenges. Many people avoid setting goals, saying, “I already know what my goals are; I don’t need to write them down.” At that point, their subconscious tells them that if they don’t set clear goals, they won’t risk failure. Unfortunately, this is just another way of saying that they don’t truly believe in their ability to do better than they currently do. It’s a fear of failure and a fear of success that keeps them from writing down and starting to work on their goals. By giving in to these fearful thoughts, you’ll delay making a list of goals until the weekend, holidays, or vacation when you’ll have a few hours to spare. Or perhaps you’ll put it off indefinitely into the distant future. And then, just like 97 percent or more of adults, you’ll never do it.

Clear goals free us from random action. Goals provide us with a clear sense of direction and the awareness that we are solely responsible for our lives. They make you feel that everything happening to us is part of an organized plan that step by step leads us to our highest ideals.

The ability to set goals and make plans is a “master skill” for achieving success, without which very little is possible. The habit of setting and achieving goals is probably more important than anything else you could learn. I’m rooting for you.